Why Kids Create Drama for Mom but Stay Calm with Dad — Expert Explains the Real Reason

If your child throws tantrums, cries easily, or becomes overly dramatic in front of you — but behaves quietly and obediently with their father — you are not alone. This common pattern often confuses parents, but pediatric experts say there is a clear emotional explanation behind it.

Children Show Their “Worst Behaviour” to Moms

According to pediatrician Dr. Rohit Bhardwaj, children tend to express their strongest emotions, frustrations, and tantrums in front of their mothers. While the same child may appear disciplined and calm with their father, it does not indicate fear or strictness alone.

In fact, many mothers assume that children behave better with fathers because dads are “strict,” but Dr. Bhardwaj says this is only partly true. The real reason lies much deeper.

Kids Feel Safest with Their Mother

The expert explains that children show their most difficult behaviour to the person they feel most emotionally attached to.

Kids subconsciously think:
“No matter how I behave, my mom will still love me.”

Because the mother is their safest emotional space, children freely release their stress, anger, sadness, or tiredness in front of her. They believe their mother will always comfort them, no matter what.

Why Children Listen to Fathers in One Go

Dr. Bhardwaj highlights that this obedience is usually not because children fear their fathers. Instead, fathers often:

• Communicate instructions clearly,
• Set firm boundaries, and
• Follow rules consistently.

Therefore, kids respond quickly to their fathers not out of fear, but because they understand that rules will not change even if they cry or protest.

Mothers Often Break Rules — Kids Notice This

Mothers, out of love and affection, sometimes soften rules — giving extra screen time, offering chocolates, or feeding the child while showing cartoons.

Children quickly learn this pattern.
They think:
“If I cry a little, Mom will give in.”

This leads them to display more emotional drama in front of their mothers.

What Should Mothers Do? Set Boundaries with Love

Dr. Bhardwaj advises mothers to continue giving love, hugs, comfort, and emotional warmth — but with clear boundaries.

Saying “no” does not reduce affection.
A mother can lovingly set rules while still being the child’s safe emotional space.

Disclaimer

This article is based on an Instagram reel shared by the expert. Navbharat Times does not claim responsibility for the accuracy of the statements made therein.